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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28609089">love so strong, it makes me feel so weak</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/neokoma/pseuds/neokoma'>neokoma</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Universe, Fluff I guess, KageHina - Freeform, M/M, No Plot/Plotless, i just needed a space to project my fantasies, idk what this is honestly, kageyama wants to be hinata’s baby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 08:47:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,082</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28609089</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/neokoma/pseuds/neokoma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
      <p>in which kageyama and hinata are infatuated with each other but kageyama is the only one with enough brain cells to figure that out (but not enough to realise hinata feels the same way about him)</p><p>———————————</p><p>i just realised today is the 3rd anniversary of my ao3 account so i figured i should write kagehina (that was a lie, it was a total coincidence i just saw that when i was editing my profile after i posted this chapter lmao n i was like wow ok)</p>
    </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. it’s too cold for you here</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>in which kageyama and hinata are infatuated with each other but kageyama is the only one with enough brain cells to figure that out (but not enough to realise hinata feels the same way about him)</p><p>———————————</p><p>i just realised today is the 3rd anniversary of my ao3 account so i figured i should write kagehina (that was a lie, it was a total coincidence i just saw that when i was editing my profile after i posted this chapter lmao n i was like wow ok)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>it is the second week of winter. kageyama is walking to school with his arms crossed, trying his best to stay as warm as possible, because kageyama tobio hates being cold. everyone in his life knows this fact. nothing out of the ordinary is happening until he sees hinata at the storefront of a convenience store, devouring a popsicle in the middle of the snow. kageyama makes a disgusted face. <em>why is he torturing himself? </em>kageyama approaches him and greets him, “the weather is already enough to give me hypothermia and kill me, but you’re here eating a popsicle early in the morning?”. when hinata sees him, he beams, “kageyama! what are you doing here?” to which kageyama turns around and is about to walk away. “wait for me to finish this first, stupid!” hinata yells at him. kageyama decides to do just that, so he turns back around and simply stands there, watching him. <em>a whole bunch of snow is getting on his popsicle and he’s eating it. seriously, how has this guy lived for 16 years without accidentally drinking acid or something? he’s so clumsy, i just want to bubble wrap him so he doesn’t end up falling in a hole and die. God, please, just help him, </em>kageyama has a hinata-related crisis in his head.</p><p>after what feels like forever, hinata is finally done with his stupid popsicle and they start walking. after a few moments of silence, kageyama turns to glance at hinata (only because his movements are slower than usual and kageyama wonders if the cold has caught up to him and if he’s going to die soon) and notices he has both his hands in the pockets of his jacket, slightly shivering. not only that, his (soft, smooth) neck is exposed too, <em>seriously, how can somebody be this dumb</em>, kageyama thinks to himself. “aren’t you cold?” he asks instead and hinata answers, “i’m fine,”. “you’re not even wearing your mittens or your scarf, dumbass, theres no way you’re fine,” kageyama stops in his tracks, hinata following suit. “yeah, actually, i don’t even have the energy to pretend that i’m not freezing to death right now, but we’re nearing the school anyway, so i’m— what are you doing?” hinata’s babbling is interrupted by kageyama wrapping him in his scarf ever so gently. kageyama doesn’t give him a reply. instead, he takes off both his mittens and takes hinata’s smaller hand, <em>(how can someone’s skin be this warm...?)</em> fitting his fingers into the holes of the mitten, one by one. he does the same with hinata’s other hand. </p><p>his touch is <em>oh so gentle, and warm, even in the midst of this snow</em>, and it’s times like this that hinata is reminded that kageyama tobio may be a violent, harsh person who is always putting on a straight face or wearing his go-to scowling expression. he is always punching, hitting and kicking at hinata to display his disagreement with him. but between the lines, he is also capable of being gentle with his touches, the frown on his face disappearing, a soft glimmer appearing in his eyes. hinata has seen him like this a lot of times, and it shouldn’t come as a surprise when he’s doing it again, and it doesn’t. he isn’t surprised, but what he is, is suddenly feeling warm all over his body. they stare at each other under the falling snow, while hinata thinks about kageyama fondly.</p><p>“but you hate the cold,” hinata looks up at him with a tint of red on his cheeks. kageyama shrugs and starts to walk again. “hey, kageyama-kun, you care so much about me, huh?” hinata nudges his shoulder with a grin on his face that slowly fades away as he tugs on the sleeve of kageyama’s jacket and asks, “but what about you?”. “im bigger,” kageyama replies, thinking it’ll satisfy the little guy next to him. “what does that even have to do with anything? you’re just trying to brag about your height and your... your bigness, aren’t you?” hinata tries to sound irritated, but how can he, when kageyama, who absolutely despises being cold more than anything, chooses to sacrifice his scarf and mittens for hinata? when kageyama chooses to keep hinata warm instead of himself? how can he be annoyed at kageyama when the butterflies in his stomach are flying around so wildly that he almost wants to puke? hinata thinks kageyama is too nice when he wants to be.</p><p>hinata doesn’t know what it means when his chest tightens and when he feels his pulse quicken whenever kageyama gets all soft with him when they’re alone. truly, he doesn’t know what he feels, but he finds that he doesn’t hate it. in fact, he likes the way kageyama makes him feel. it’s part of the reason why he lets kageyama does this to him. he thinks kageyama’s softness makes his heart race because it somehow might be kageyama’s plan to lower his guard to trap him and beat him up instead. talk about stupid. he concludes that <em>yeah, maybe that’s why i get so nervous when he does that</em>. he pulls the scarf on his neck up a little higher to hide the smile that he can’t seem to stop from getting wider, and because he’s cold, obviously (and Not because he wants to bask in kageyama’s cool, comforting scent, that’s weird, yup, definitely not).</p><p>hinata sees kageyama rubbing the palm of his hands together from the corner of his eyes when kageyama thinks he isn’t looking, so hinata takes kageyama’s hand and holds it tight in his. “there. this way, we both won’t die of hypothermia!” hinata exclaims. when kageyama raises his other hand with a strange look on his face <em>(is he blushing? i’m probably just imagining it, </em>hinata thinks), hinata laughs and says, “what? do you want me to hold your other hand, too? you’re right, kageyama, you <em>are</em> bigger than me, a bigger baby!”</p><p> </p><p><em>maybe i wanna be <strong>your</strong> baby</em>. kageyama does Not think that.</p><p> </p><p>he does.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. i crumble completely when you cry</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p2">
  <span class="s2">hinata is always the first to get in position before a match starts. be it an official one or at practice, he’s always the most eager to spike the balls tossed to him and to fly on the court. so why is it that even though it’s been 15 minutes since everyone has been in their positions, yet hinata is nowhere to be seen? the players of the opposing team are starting to look restless, fidgeting around and messing with each other. “is hinata okay? where is he?” coach ukai starts, worry painted all over his face. “i’ll look for him,” kageyama volunteers.</span>
</p><p class="p2"><span class="s2">he runs through the hallways, passing by the bathroom stalls, the vending machine, and finally, he checks the park behind the building, just in case. hinata is still nowhere to be found. <em>he couldn’t have holed up in the girls’ bathroom, right? that guy is an idiot so i wouldn’t be surprised, but i really don’t want to go in there. where the hell are you, dumbass? </em></span> <span class="s2">kageyama worries. he doesn’t like to tell himself this, that he worries about hinata. but he can berate himself for that later, because right now he’s tasked with the job to find a certain stupid, annoying, orange-haired boy. annoying orange, if he mights. as he reluctantly makes his way to the girls’ bathroom, he finds who he’s looking for. </span></p><p class="p2"><span class="s2">hinata is standing right in front of the door leading inside, facing the wall and bouncing his knee. <em>was he actually in the girls’ bathroom this whole time? </em></span> <span class="s2">“what are you doing here? everyone’s looking for you,” hinata jumps at hearing kageyama’s voice, somehow not expecting anyone to come looking for him after having disappeared for 15 minutes. “i-i’ll be there in a minute,” hinata says as he turns around, and kageyama gets a better look at him. his face is without colour, his expression unreadable, and his hands are shaking. </span> <span class="s3"><em>trembling</em>. </span> <span class="s2">if kageyama didn’t know better, he would’ve thought hinata was getting anxious the way he had been during their first practice match with seijoh. wait. or maybe... ah. kageyama gets it now. </span></p><p class="p2"><span class="s2">“hinata, it’s just a practice match with the alumni team, we’ve done this plenty of times already,” kageyama reminds him. “i know that! and i’m fine, just let me be for a second, i just need to—,” hinata lies right through his teeth and kageyama can tell, so he sighs, and interrupts him, “come over here,”. hinata doesn’t think, he has no will to form any kind of thought in his little head, so he walks over to kageyama. “don’t get mad at me, i don’t know why i’m suddenly really nervous. i know we’ve done this so many times before, but i couldn’t stop puking for some reason and it feels just like that time during our first match, and...” hinata sighs, looking up at kageyama with a tired look on his face. kageyama doesn’t say anything, he just goes to cup hinata’s small face with his large hands and gently brushes his thumbs across hinata’s puffy cheeks (<em>had he been crying? God</em></span> <span class="s3">)</span> <span class="s2">. and there it is. he’s doing it again. kageyama’s doing that thing where his usual frowning, angry face is replaced with soft eyes, looking straight into hinata’s. their height difference is forcing hinata to strain his neck a little, and kageyama to slightly bend down. the warmth of kageyama’s hands around his face makes him feel so safe and so good and hinata feels like crying again, right then and there, breaking apart in front of kageyama. so he does. and every single one of his tears are being brushed away by big, soft thumbs, telling him that <em>it’s okay, it’s going to be fine, you’re going to be fine, you’re going to fly high just like you always do, </em></span><span class="s2">but he’s too occupied with sobbing into kageyama’s hands that he doesn’t notice it. </span></p><p class="p2"><span class="s2">if kageyama is going to be completely honest, he never really thinks whenever he’s with hinata. his body just moves on autopilot, doing whatever his heart tells him to. he thinks it’s dangerous, but he also thinks hinata is too dense to realise how kageyama truly feels about him just by his actions, so he doesn’t do anything about it. kageyama could kiss him senseless right here and hinata would still think nothing of it. kageyama has never been someone who’s good at comforting other people, he’s never been a comforting person in general. he’s never done a single comforting action in his entire life. he’s never had to, because who the hell comes to kageyama tobio for comfort? so when hinata is weeping in his hands, it renders him speechless. his heart aches seeing the person who is usually overflowing with energy so worn out like this. he so badly wants to reach out and hold hinata close to his chest, to pat his head and tell him everything is going to be fine. but he doesn’t say anything, </span> <em> <span class="s3">can’t </span> </em> <span class="s2">say anything, his mouth doesn’t allow him to. all he manages are the light caresses of his thumbs on hinata’s small features.</span></p><p class="p2"><span class="s2">hinata continues pouring out his tears until he runs out, until there’s nothing left for kageyama to wipe on his face. eventually, he stops crying, and they stand there staring at each other, with kageyama still cupping his cheeks and his hands on kageyama’s bony wrists. finally, hinata whispers, “your hands are really soft,” <em>for someone so aggressive all the time</em></span> <span class="s3">, </span> <span class="s2">he wants to continue, but he doesn’t. “is that why you’ve got your snot all over my hands?” kageyama asks, trying to look annoyed. hinata laughs and kicks him in the knee, though it doesn’t hurt. </span></p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s2">they walk back to the gym in silence, hinata still thinking about the strokes of kageyama’s thumbs on his damp cheeks earlier. he thinks he’s never seen kageyama do this with anyone else, and he doesn’t think he can picture it, too. even when kageyama doesn’t say anything, his presence and his touch is enough to soothe him. he doesn’t think too much about how and why he can be so affected by kageyama, so he smiles to himself quietly, oblivious to his true feelings.</span>
</p><p class="p3"> </p><p class="p3">and no, hinata had <em>not</em> been having a breakdown in the girls’ bathroom.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. our fingers dancing when they meet</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>it happened on a sunday evening. the weather was perfect for running, with the cold, harsh days of winter slowly melting and welcoming the blooming spring, so kageyama went. he went running for a while, and as he decided that he’d had enough of it for that day, he started to make his way back home. some of the flower petals had started to fall off, looking like it was raining pink everywhere. kageyama had thought it was the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen, until a few of the petals got stuck to his clothes. <em>no</em>, he thought, as he struggled to get them off him and before he knew it, he'd tripped over a big stone that wasn’t even there before and went rolling down the steep hill. well. there he goes.</p><p>the doctor had informed him and his parents that his right arm was fractured, though he could recover fully in a few weeks. under different circumstances, he wouldn’t mind a broken arm for a few weeks of his life, but what this would mean for him was no volleyball. and suddenly, a few weeks seemed too long for him, seemed much longer than he could take. since his dominant arm was the one to fall victim to the consequences of his actions, he couldn’t really perform his day-to-day activities as efficiently without hinata by his side, making fun of him. which is exactly what is happening right now.</p><p>they’re eating lunch, or rather, hinata is the only one eating. kageyama is sitting opposite of him, trying (and failing) to trim the nails of his right hand. “come on, kageyama! we only have 15 minutes left until break ends, you’re never gonna get to eat your lunch if you keep doing that,” hinata reminds him for the fifth time that day. “i know, i’ll be done with this in a few, just shut up,” hinata rolls his eyes at that, and tells him, “you can trim your nails at home for however long you want! see, you’re so slow, i’m already done with my lunch, now nobody’s gonna keep you company while you eat. if you'll still have time to eat, that is,”. hinata doesn’t really know what kind of reaction he was expecting, but he definitely didn’t expect kageyama to <em>pout</em>. right in front of him.</p><p>hinata can't help but laugh at him. <em>cute</em>, he thinks. kageyama looks cute when he’s kind of sulking. he also doesn’t care what hinata says, he’s going to finish trimming his nails right then and there, even if it’s the last thing he’ll ever do. his determination is impressive. hinata sighs, knowing there’s no saving him. kageyama being too absorbed with his precious nails, his mind doesn’t register it when hinata brings a chair to sit next to him and gets the nail clipper off his hands. “no! what are you—“ kageyama is about to throw a fit, when hinata interrupts him, “i’m gonna help trim your nails so you can start eating your lunch, dumbass,”. “i thought i was clumsier than you, but at least i’ve never rolled down a stupid hill and broke my stupid arm. my dominant arm, at that,” he continues while he starts trimming. any hint of annoyance that kageyama might feel fades away almost completely when his brain tells him how much care hinata is putting into trimming his nails right now, occasionally asking him if it hurts anywhere.</p><p>“does it hurt?"</p><p> </p><p>“am i going too deep?”</p><p> </p><p>“tell me if it hurts,”</p><p> </p><p>“don’t move, do you wanna bleed that bad?”</p><p> </p><p>“this thing is too sharp! you should’ve brought a blunt one,”</p><p>“if it was blunt, no trimming would ever be done, stupid,”</p><p>kageyama knows hinata is a lot of things. loud, annoying, energetic, hardworking, determined. what he doesn’t know, or what he just came to know, is that hinata can be very careful just as much as he can be clumsy. and right now, he’s proving kageyama right. his suddenly very small fingers are holding kageyama’s lightly to stable it, while his right hand is trimming kageyama’s nails with an intense focus in his eyes that kageyama rarely sees. he knows that he adores hinata the way he is. no matter how he tries to hide it, he always gives himself away whenever he lets hinata get away with drooling all over his shoulder when he sleeps on it in the bus, stealing his milk, and playing with his fingers (hinata doesn’t do this often, because whenever he looks like he’s going to do it, kageyama runs away before he has a chance to). he recognises his (very non-platonic) feelings for his best friend. he knows what hinata is capable of doing to his heart, he prepares himself for it everyday. but as time passes, hinata just keeps doing things kageyama could never have seen coming. maybe that’s why kageyama’s heart won’t stop fluttering so hard every time they’re together. he can’t say that he hates it, he can never hate anything hinata does to him. kageyama feels a pang to his chest, because <em>does he even know what he’s doing to me is wrong and illegal? he’s being so gentle and for what? God, he must have no idea how much it’s taking me to not grab him his stupid little face and kiss the shit out of him right now</em>.</p><p>in the midst of kageyama’s crisis (he has a lot of those these days, most of them are caused by hinata), hinata is looking up at him and asking, “what?”. kageyama only now realises he’s been staring at him this whole time, and he answers, without thinking very much, “while you’re at it, why don’t you feed me, too?”. “how many things do you think i can do at once? i don’t have three hands, stupid,” hinata smacks the back of his head, to which kageyama winces.</p><p>“so you’re saying that if you <em>did</em> have three hands, you’d feed me?”</p><p>“i never said that," hinata says, a little smile playing at his lips.</p><p> </p><p>“maybe,” hinata whispers, quietly enough so that it’s only audible to himself.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
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